Unknowing

My life has not been extraordinary. I have not suffered outside the realms of the normal human experience. I have only been confronted by grief and loss as we all have or will, and I do not carry heartache with me. Instead, I keep it in a box on my bookshelf, and sometimes late at night when the window is open and the world has stopped its noises I open it. In the moonlight it shines. I cry and this is precious.

FIREWORK

pt 1 /- Dirrty 2002 2am

zips red and white jacket motorbike

continues beyond edges

if you can’t trust me who can you trust

but doesn’t it always

etc

echo……….

echo……

crowd duh

you don’t know what’s happening out here beyond the screen. beyond the walls you deserve to be happy. you deserve to be free of

trust me, rides motorbike thru juggalo crowd

if u don’t, also order water

close-up of Redman’s teeth, but seriously though

steamy shower in rainforest

add me

cream beige lip-gloss, ornate gold labret, ornate gold nose stud, black eyes, because you’re worth it

then u should’ve put a fire whirl on it

a chainlink fence on fence on fence on fire

she pops out of the cage, no one talks to her, about how the casino burns to the ground, every fucking hour on the hour.

I’m tired,

fucking,

condemned wharves.

face so foundation it’s butter

watch flames

forest fists

leeches: inner thighs

melting

scented bin liners

& she’s still inside u

scented panty liners

red with an “X” on the back, chaps & smoking is still

ttly dodelijk.

moss inside, slashes in the ground, hair so black it’s white;

moist an optical illusion in the centre of the ring, which is square

wet draws u

anime off switch

generous to reader by believing that they can deal with it, whatever that is

one nostril blocked

a real page turner

add someone on facebook

that’s enough now i started writing again

L’Incendie

France is a cold, proud place. In winter, the snow is brittle and grimy, white like bone. The people seem equally cold-blooded. They walk through biting gales of wind with pink lips, blue veins and hearts full of contempt.

To The Girl Who Forgot Me

I’ve been thinking about you a lot. I’ve decided to delete the history of us on Facebook. Before I unfriended you the other night, I went to your profile and clicked the ‘see friendship’ button. It told me that we became Facebook friends on a Sunday in March 2011.

Hard Day’s Work

I haven’t done a hard day’s work in over five years. Not since I walked out of my last shift at Subway Indooroopilly into the pub, asking my coworker to tell the boss in the morning that I had called the store and quit. As I drank that night I promised myself that I wouldn’t be a cog in someone else’s machine again. I owned myself and if I fucked up then it was all on me. I ended up fucking up a lot.

Removals

Someone has stuck a sanitary pad to the inside of the stall door. It’s raining hard outside. I stand back from the toilet, my feet shoulder width apart, to avoid stepping in the puddle of piss. Someone has stuck a pad to the inside of the door, but all I can think about is how I don’t want to move house. The band is getting ready to start. I can hear the tentative twangs and booms of the guitars and bass being taken up through the walls of the toilet. I wash my hands.

Giving Tao Lin Good Quality Marijuana in Melbourne, Australia After Reading a Tweet Tao Lin Wrote in Brisbane, Australia About His Desire for Marijuana

In the morning I woke up and looked at tweets on my phone while lying in bed. One tweet I looked at was by Tao Lin, who was in Australia for the Brisbane, Sydney and Melbourne Writer’s Festivals. Tao Lin’s tweet said, does anyone in Brisbane have marijuana binky.tabby@gmail.com. I copied the email address binky.tabby@gmail.com and wrote Tao Lin an email.

Life and My Box: Dear Sally

Kate Zahnleiter was raised by a single working mother and a television. She writes that “not a day goes by in which I’m unable to relate something which occurs in real life back to an episode of something I watched as a child, teenager or young adult.” In Life and My Box, Kate shares the lessons she has learned from TV. 

Speeding

When I drove to my grandfather’s funeral I was almost stopped by the police. I had been driving the stretch of Pacific Highway between Brisbane and the Gold Coast twenty kilometres over the speed limit, partly because I was running late, and partly because I was twenty years old and a terrible driver.

Swimming Lessons

On Sunday I got high and went to the local swimming pool. The pool is small and heritage listed, surrounded by wooden bathing huts. There is no diving allowed and the deep end isn’t very deep. The only other people using the pool were adults taking part in a learn-to-swim class.